Dare to Live

Try looking at tomorrow not yesterday
And all the things you left behind
All those tender words you did not say
The gentle touch you couldn't find

In these days of nameless faces
There is no one truth but only pieces
My life is all I have to give

Dare to live until the very last
Dare to live forget about the past
Dare to live giving something of yourself to others
Even when it seems there's nothing more left to give

Ma se tu vedessi l'uomo
Davanti al tuo portone
Che dorme avvolto in un cartone,
Se tu ascoltassi il mondo una mattina
Senza il rumore della pioggia,
Tu che puoi creare con la tua voce,
Tu, pensi i pensieri della gente,
Poi, di Dio c'e solo Dio.

Vivere, nessuno mai ce l'ha insegnato,
Vivere, non si pu? vivere senza passato,
Vivere ? bello anche se non l'hai chiesto mai,
Una canzone ci sar?, qualcuno che la canter?

Dare to live searching for the ones you love
(Perch?, perch?, perch?, perch? non vivi questa sera?)
Dare to live no one but we all
(Perch?, perch?, perch?, perch? non vivi ora?)
Dare to live until the very last
(Perch?, perch?, perch? la vita non ? vita)
Your life is all you have to give (Perch?)
non l'hai vissuta
Vivere!

Dare to live until the very last
(Perch?, perch?, perch? Ia vita non ? vita)
Your life is all you have to give (Perch?)
non l'hai vissuta mai

I will say no (I will say yes)
Say dare to live
Dare to live

Karma

Sometimes you have to lose something to gain something more valuable.
They say that when you fall you gotta get up again.
I did that once.
But when I walked away I felt the hurt on my knee.
I rolled up my jeans and saw a cut.
It was deep and hurt alot, eventually though it dried up. And then became a scab.
A scab that I picked and threw away.
Now I have a scar!
A scar that will always remind me of that time I fell.

The only thing is it wasn't that simple, I didnt just hurt my knee and it didnt just heal.
It was more like I was pushed down like you held me down.
I did get up, but it was hard.
I want you to somehow know what you did and somehow understand that I'm no longer mad.
But remember there is something called Karma. But I'll touch on that later.

My knee was my heart, and the cut was a stab, and the scab was a lesson, a lesson I will always remember because of the scar.
The bruise that changed my life and made me who I am and allows me to forgive you.
I lost you, I willingly backed down I gave you up. I couldn't anymore. I felt that i didnt need to fight that I should have had to fight for something that was mine.
So I lost you but now I found myself and some one found me. That's someone who I dont have to fight for. Someone who stands by me and makes me tall. Someone who caught me and when I fell cleaned my knee and kissed it. Someone who taught me to be careless and not worry about falling!
But karma is funny and life and is even funnier. You see I suffered and learned I lost and gained. But you ? You have to pay for what you did and life will charge you not me. I let go and I left it alone but destiny will play her game. And it will hurt. You see you have not 1 but 2 daughters.

Two that will one day get their hearts torn apart, that will love so blind and so naive. That will give everything without expecting a pain so hard! They will both cry! They will cry like it rains, they will think that they cant go on, they will fall and you have to watch them fall and try to help them raise., But they wont want your help. They'll want "his" help. You'll hate "him" for lying to them, for using them, for telling them what they want to hear. For building their dreams and then shattering their hopes. You will hate "him" for being just like you.
And that in itself is Karma.

And life's a bitch and then we die. It's a continuing cycle. And destiny will deal you your cards and you will have to deal with it. You'll hurt watching them hurt, you'll ask why these young boys do the things they do? Then on that day, you'll remember me, my tears, my pain and on the day that one of those girls falls I'll raise her high, and explain the cycle to her.
She'll lose someone and gain something more.

Bob Marley Says

I've always had a love for quotations. Just saw one of my colleagues making a note on this, and find it meaningful, hence I'm sharing it with you:

He's not perfect. You aren't either, and the two of you can never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can. He isn't going to quote poetry, he's not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he know that you could break. Don't hurt him, don't change him, and don't expect more than he can give. Don't analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he's not there.

Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guy don't exist, but there's always one guy that is perfect for you.



"Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.


You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful.


There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.


The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face.


In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.


You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.


You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life."

- Bob Marley

I think his quotes are good. Check some of them out here.

What A Woman Should Have and Know

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...

1. Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...
2. Something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...
3. A youth she's content to leave behind....
4. A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....
5. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...
6. One friend who always makes her laugh... And one who lets her cry...
7. A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...
8. Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored....
9. A feeling of control over her destiny...
10. How to fall in love without losing herself..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

1. How to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship....
2. When to try harder... And when to walk away...
3. That she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..
4. That her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over....
5. What she would and wouldn't do for love or more....
6. How to live alone... Even if she doesn't like it...
7. Whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...
8. Where to go - be it to her best friend's kitchen table, or a charming inn in the woods when her soul needs soothing...
9. What she can and can't accomplish in a day, a month, and a year...

Summary of 2010

2010 has passed, and now we're in the new year!

2010 has been a very eventful year for me.

The following happened to me:

1. Found a new job
Yes, I quit my job of 5 years. The company that I had joined since my graduation in 2005. The unhappiness has been building up, hence the resignation was necessary. Luckily for me, I found a job that I am currently very happy with - Great place, great colleagues, great professors that I'm supporting. A steep learning curve definitely, but I'm definiately up to it!
2. Underwent a surgery
In case you're wondering, it's not plastic surgery. Not that I need any plastic surgery (maybe except for a boob job), but it was a small break that I took at the end of my previous employment as I could not stand that company anymore! Got a 8 day hospitalization leave, and the leave that was encashed was used to buy a LV wallet.
3. Got lied to
Yes, Ignatius Daniel Cai lied to/cheated on/willfully concealed information from me. If you didn't hear the story from me, it must mean something, doesn't it?
4. Got picked up
2009 was on MRT, 2010 was on a bus. It was a wonderful 6 weeks. I wonder where it would be for 2011? Well, there's 12 months to find out! ;) Of course I'm not forgetting the food places!
5. Went on a holiday alone
I've been on quite a number of trips in 2010 (with the airfares being so affordable), but I went to Bintan in Dec10 alone. Yes, you heard me right, ALONE. But it's a good experience! All I did was to treat myself right, and I met great people there!
6. Death
My Hammie Baby died. I love you Hammie, RIP.

This list by no means is everything that happened to me in 2010, but I believe that I will have a more eventful (in a good way) 2011!

Sorry Sorry

I know this is like super slow, but I'm caught up with Super Junior's 'Sorry Sorry'.

Yes, a hit in 2009 that I am only caught up with nearing 2011 - So sue me! =P

Hair for Hope 2011?

I'm seriously considering doing the Hair for Hope 2011.

I have toyed with the idea of going bald in secondary school, due to the fact that I was thoroughly stressed there.

No worries, I'm not stressed at work here, neither am I going to undergo a drastic change because of huge swings of emotions. It's just a matter of getting a heartfelt wish settled.

Maybe a change of hairstyle would do me good for my luck as well?

Hair for Hope would take place in July. Let's see if my mood is still there when Jul11 rolls about! ;)

Actually

It's time to let go.

We had great times, great memories, but unfortunately, we don't have great trust.

You didn't trust to tell me, and now I can't trust that whatever you say is the truth.

It was a pleasure meeting you, but it's time to go our separate ways.

Actually, if you ask me why I can't trust - take a look at the photos that was in your recycle bin.

The dates whereby it was taken was in 2010 - What can I say?

I Don't Know

I don't know to be sad or glad.

I'm glad that you went to get the page(s) back.

I'm sad that you have lost a friend because of this.

I'm glad that you try your best to reassure me.

I'm sad that your reaction to the incident is not what I have expected.

I don't know whether to be sad or glad that this has happened, because I don't know what will happen next.

Taking things slow

Sometimes it is just not possible to jump back into a pool after almost drowning in it.

To overcome the fear, one way to get back into the pool would be to take things slow - toe dipping, wading into the pool, and a slow submission into the pool again.

In a relationship, if there has been a misunderstanding, of course it would take time to get things back to normal.

Both our definitions of taking things slow are definitely different. For me, it's taking one step at a time, not spending more time with you until I am more comfortable with you. That simply translates to things like not spending the whole day with you, or staying over at your place. And the way you translate it is that I am putting a distance between us.

If you think that it feels like I'm being a stranger, yes I agree.

If you are thinking now that whether there is another reason why I don't wish to stay over at your place, it's just very simple: You promised to get back the passport page within these two weeks, and if I spend time over at your place, how are you going to do so?

If you feel that my equating of the situation between us as a muscle which has snapped, or undergone tremendous trauma is inappropriate, I apologize, but that's my take on this.

Validation

Check this out: Validation

It's true, don't everybody need validation? If there's someone who is a sincere validator, I bet the business would be a booming one! But then again, won't money change everything?

I love T.J. Thyne, aka Hodgins from Bones... And I LOVE Bones!! (Ok, this is totally random)

Condition or Reassurance?

Well, apparently you don't visit here.

If you say that my asking of the emails or sms or call records is as a condition of our reconcillation, what are you trying to imply?

You might think that it's a condition, why not think of it as a form of reassurance or validation?

My Choice

I forgive you, but it might take some time to regain trust and restore our relationship.

Forgiveness is one thing; Reconciliation is another

Ok, this post is lengthy, but helpful. Origin here.

It is common for those who have been seriously hurt to feel hesitant about reconciling with their offenders. When your offender is genuinely repentant, however, it is important to open yourself to the possibility of restoration. Remember, Jesus spoke about reconciliation with a sense of urgency (see Matthew 5:23-24). If you are hesitant to reconcile, work through the ten guidelines on the next pages.

1. Be honest about your motives -Make sure that your desire is to do what pleases God and not to get revenge. Settle the matter of forgiveness (as Joseph did) in the context of your relationship with God. Guidelines for reconciliation should not be retaliatory.
2. Be humble in your attitude -Do not let pride ruin everything. Renounce all vengeful attitudes toward your offender. We are not, for example, to demand that a person earn our forgiveness. The issue is not earning forgiveness, but working toward true reconciliation. This demands humility. Those who focus on retaliation and revenge have allowed self-serving pride to control them.
3. Be prayerful about the situation -Jesus taught his disciples to pray for those who mistreat them (Luke 6:28). It is amazing how our attitude toward another person can change when we pray for him. Pray also for strength to follow through with reconciliation (see: Hebrews 4:16).
4. Be willing to admit ways you might have contributed to the problem –“Even if you did not start the dispute, your lack of understanding, careless words, impatience, or failure to respond in a loving manner may have aggravated the situation. When this happens, it is easy to behave as though the other person’s sins more than cancel yours, which leaves you with a self- righteous attitude that can retard forgiveness (i.e. relational forgiveness). The best way to overcome this tendency is to prayerfully examine your role in the conflict and then write down everything you have done or failed to do that may have been a factor.” (Ken Sande, p. 168). Such a step, however, is not suggested to promote the idea of equal blame for all situations. (See: Matthew 7:1-6) (Italicized words added).
5. Be honest with the offender -If you need time to absorb the reality of what was said or done, express this honestly to the one who hurt you. Yet we must not use time as a means of manipulation and punishment.
6. Be objective about your hesitancy –Perhaps you have good reasons for being hesitant to reconcile, but they must be objectively stated. Sometimes, for example, repeated confessions and offenses of the same nature make it understandably hard for trust to be rebuilt. This is an objective concern. Clearly define your reasons for doubting your offender’s sincerity.
7. Be clear about the guidelines for restoration -Establish clear guidelines for restoration. Requirements like restitution can be clearly understood. Others include financial accountability, holding down a job, and putting away substances.
8. Be realistic about the process -Change often requires time and hard work. Periodic failure by an offender does not always indicate an unrepentant heart. Behavior patterns often run in deep channels. They can place a powerful grip on a person’s life. A key indicator for change is the attitude of the offender. While you may proceed with some caution, be careful about demanding guarantees from a person who has truly expressed repentance. If the person stumbles, the process of loving confrontation, confession, and forgiveness may need to be repeated . Setbacks and disappointments are often part of the process of change. Don’t give up too easily on process of reconciliation. Keep the goal of a fully restored relationship open.
9. Be mindful of God’s control –“No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, that you may be able to endure it” (1 Corinthians 10:13). “We know that God works all things together for good for those who love him and are called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28). “When you are having a hard time forgiving someone (i.e. being restored), take time to note how God may be using that offense for good. Is this an unusual opportunity to glorify God? How can you serve others and help them grow in their faith? What sins and weaknesses of yours are being exposed? What character qualities are you being challenged to exercise? When you perceive that the person who has wronged you is being used as an instrument in God’s hand to help you mature, serve others, and glorify him, it may be easier for you to move ahead with forgiveness (i.e. restoration)” (Ken Sande, p.165;cf. Hebrews 12:7;I Pet.2:23b; 4:19). (Italicized words added).
10. Be alert to Satan’s schemes -In Ephesians 4:27, the apostle warns about the possibility of giving Satan an opportunity in our lives. Significantly, this warning is given in the context of unchecked anger. A few verses later, the Apostle wrote, ” Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you, and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God” (Ephesians 4:29-5:2). Meditate on these words and put them into practice! (See also: II Corinthians 2:14; Hebrews 12:15).

What is forgiving and forgetting in a relationship?

What is forgiving and forgetting in a relationship?

1. Forgiving is allowing another person to be human for faults, mistakes or misdeeds. Forgetting is putting these behind you; they are no longer brought up and no longer remain a barrier to your relationship.

2. Forgiving is letting another know that there is no grudge, hard feelings or animosity for any wrongdoing. Forgetting is the lack of further discussion, with no ongoing negative references to the event.

3. Forgiving is letting the other person know that you accept as genuine the remorse and sorrow for actions or words that hurt or disappointed you. Forgetting is promising that this deed, whether of omission or commission, will not be brought up again.

4. Forgiving is accepting the sincerity of penance, sorrow and regret expressed over a grievous personal offense; making it sufficient to clear the air. Forgetting is your commitment to let go of anger, hurt and pain over this offense.

5. Forgiving is giving a sign that a person's explanation or acceptance of blame for a destructive, hurtful or painful act is fully accepted. Forgetting is the development of a plan of action between the two of you to heal the scars resulting from the behavior.

6. Forgiving is the highest form of human behavior that can be shown to another person. It means being vulnerable to being hurt or offended in the future, yet setting aside this in order to reopen and heal the channels of communication. Forgetting is is also a noble human behavior; it is letting go of the need to seek revenge for past offenses.

7. Forgiving is the act of love between you and a person who has hurt you; the bandage that holds the wound together long enough to heal. Forgetting is also an act of love; in rehabilitation therapy, helping the wounded return to a full and functional life.

8. Forgiving is the God-like gift of spiritually connecting with others, touching their hearts to calm the fear of rejection, quiet the sense of failure and lighten the burden of guilt. Forgetting is the God-like gift of spiritually touching others' hearts with the reassurance of a happy and full life with no fear of recrimination.

9. Forgiving is the act of letting go of temporary ill will, disappointment or the disgust that arises from the break in your relationship. Forgetting is bridging this gap in the relationship, eventually strengthening it against such a break in the future.

10. Forgiving is an act of compassion, humanity and gentleness by which you let another know that he is indeed a child of the universe upon whom a variety of graces and blessings have been showered and that current or past offenses need not be a barrier to goodness. Forgetting is the act of encouragement, support and reinforcement by which you assist the other person to rebuild, reconnect and re-establish a loving, caring, healthy relationship with you and the world.

What keeps a relationship strong

What keeps a relationship strong is:
1. Trust
2. Communication
3. Intimacy
4. A sense of humor
5. Sharing tasks
6. Some getaway time without business or children
7. Daily exchanges (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes, etc.)
8. Sharing common goals and interests
9. Giving each other space to grow without feeling insecure
10. Giving each other a sense of belonging and assurances of commitment

Chances

I am not sure.

Like what you said - if trust is not there, it is very hard to continue.

But I would like to be proved beyond a reasonable doubt as to whether I am wrong or right.

Taking chances is what I like to do. I took a chance one year ago. And now? I don't know.

But still, I miss you.

Beware of Garbage Trucks

Beware of Garbage Trucks By David J. Pollay

How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive colleague ruin your day? Unless you're a robot, you are bound to blow your top off. However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly he or she can get back his or her focus on what's important.

Sixteen years ago, I learned this lesson. I learn it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happen.

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just inches!

The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us.

My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean he was really friendly. So, I said, 'Why did you do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!'

And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now called, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck'.

Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. If they happen to dump it on you, don't take it personally.

You just smile, wave, wish them well, and moved on. You'll be happier if you did that rather than fight them.

So this was it: 'The Law of the Garbage Truck'.

I started thinking, how often do I let garbage trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the street? It was that day I said, 'I'm not going to do it anymore.' I see garbage trucks everywhere and everyday. I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my taxi driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.

Good leaders know they have to be ready for their next meeting. Good parents know they have to welcome their kids home from school with hugs and kisses. Teachers and parents know that they have to be fully present and at their best for the people they care about.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by?

Here's my bet. You'll be happier.

So...love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.
Believe that every thing happens for a reason.
If you get a chance, TAKE IT!
If it changes your life, LET IT!
Nobody said it would be easy...
They just promised it would be WORTH IT

Cheers!
"Life is short. Enjoy the journey."

Proof

Is there any proof that you can show me to settle my heart?

Give me peace of mind, or just kill me with a blow.

Somebody kill me!

It hurts. I hurt. I'm angry, I'm sad. My emotions are totally in a mess.

Somebody kill me!